Haiku and the Pictograph in EL, "a buzz of wings" by Carol Raisfeld - June 2006 -

. . . .

This is an EL (Earth Language) experimental page to enjoy
the image of a haiku/short poem originally in English/Japanese.
When you can't see the Japanese parts, please don't mind and just skip those parts , or see here to view Japanese.

This June, away from San Francisco, I'm going to read a book or to sketch
in a garden, where the scene like this haiku could happen!
This haiku is from the haiku-page 11 in the beautiful web site, "Haiku Buds"
of photography and poetry by Carol Raisfeld in New York.
Also this haiku was mentioned that it was originally in
World Haiku Review: v5n1-2005 neoclassical-best ten.
For keeping the rhythm of haiku, I changed the word sequence of
the Japanese translation a little, putting "dragonfly" in the tail:
after a buzz and the shade, "Oh, dragonfly!"; here I imagined the early season of dragonflies.
The EL translation follows the original.

この俳句は、ニューヨークのCarol Raisfeldさんの
美しい写真や俳句や詩を満載した "Haiku Buds" の中の
the haiku-page 11から採らせて頂きました。
心の動きを順に追って、 トンボが新鮮なシーズンの感じを出してみました。

The original haiku by Carol Raisfeld:
a buzz of wings—
the dragonfly's shadow
slips across the page

The Japanese translation:

The EL translation:

The symbols in the pictograph:
: sound (音), : vibration (ふるえ), : wave (波), : dragonfly (トンボ)

The symbols in the EL translation:
{ sky, parts of bird)}: wing(s) (翼:日本語では羽ですが、機能的に)
{ move, wave}: shaking, vibration (震え)
{ time/ear-shape, wave}: sound (a sort of wave recognized by the ear with time)(音)
: plural (dot, point) shows a pause (複数の点でポーズを表す)
{ insect (fundamental), (for the parallel wings shape)}: dragonfly (トンボ)
{ opposite of { , }light}: shadow (影)
: grammatical symbol to form a verb (動詞符)
{ opposite of friction}: slippery, slip (vi. with d-verb symbol)(滑り、動詞符を伴うと滑る)
: vi. slip (滑る)
{ preposition mark, way/go through}: going through ..) (〜を通って)
{ sheet,{ abstract thing, and here it's for number), from (the beginning)}: sequence (順番)}: page

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